- Emotions are not intuitive
- There is something wrong with everyone, it is what binds us
- Religion used to console us about our misery
- With the decline of religion, we thought culture could replace it, but it has not
- We want emotional rewards associated with materials, not the materials themselves
- Meritocracy believes people on top deserve to be on the top and people on the bottom deserve to be on the bottom
- (Conversely, you are where you deserve to be)
- Ancient societies used to believe the “divine” had a strong effect on success or failure
- “They are unfortunate” literally “They are not touched by the goddess Fortune”
- “Loser” denotes someone who is failing in a race
- Failure and vulnerability are the only way to make friends
- We know ourselves from the inside but others only from the outside
- Leaning into the weirdness brings relief
- Having a divine interloper brings relief
- A problem on devices is that we do not have enough time with our own thoughts
- Childhood sets our pattern for the rest of our lives… until we defuse it
- We all start as a True Self but build (by choice or force) a False Self on top
- Often, a mental breakdown is because the True Self is breaking through
- Transference is moving historical behavior into the present context
- The most “adult” people are the ones who have reconciled their childhoods
- Romanticism has corrupted our ideas about relationships
- There are no soul mates
- Disagreements are normal
- Instincts (our feelings) tells us we are in love
- Humans replaced Angels
- (Romantics tended to die young… which helped them hold their paradigm)
- Sex is the same as love
- We should be loving who someone can become, not who they are
- Mind reading is short-lived
- We are not “falling in love” so much as “refinding love”
- The problem is, we are basing “love” on what we grew up with
- We avoid people who are too healthy for us because we associate love with suffering
- We are often too selfless because we do not know how to not be
- Ask yourself: “If I dared to be more selfish I would…”
- Parents needs to be “good enough”
- The role of parents is to let kids down in a structured way
- “The best cure for love is knowledge”
- Forgiveness comes naturally after peace is achieved
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