Author: Daniel

  • The Nasty Business of Repentance

    Sin is a nasty business. The one thing worse than sin is repentance. Sure, there is a nice, peaceful feeling that comes from repenting but it can be hell to get there, literally. I speak from experience. A year ago, on 11 May 2009, to be exact, I experienced some indiscretion that I have regretted ever since. It was a mistake that I had made many times before, but that I had vowed to not make again.

    My penitent heart had remained clean for several months before that fateful Monday. I don’t even remember why, only that I had been distracted enough to not guard against failure and thus I failed. I had a simple task that day, one that could have been done all morning; I never did it. I will confess: an inventory report seems a simple thing, even an innocent thing unlikely thing to cause so much grief. In the end it did.

    The way the inventory report works is that it takes a snapshot of the inventory as it stands at that very moment. There is no going back, no time travel, no way to make up for a lost report. Thus, for one who fails to run the report, the only way to repent is to wait a whole year until the blemish of a missing data point is erased by the natural course of circulating data as the charts only have one year, or 52 data points, worth of data.

    In this case I had to wait the entire year to repent and am relieved to report that as of 10 May 2010, one year after my folly, the charts are again pristine and my repentance is complete. The cleansing graces of atonement can once again abide with me.

  • 24 pound paper, how I love you!

    Have you felt the difference between 20 pound (normal copier paper in the blue packaging) and 24 pound (better printing paper in the red packaging) paper? It may sound like a tiny difference, and it is. But when I turn a page of 20 pound paper it feels cheap and nearly worthless; when I turn the page of 24 pound paper it feels like turning the page of a heaven sent, blessed work approved by God himself and thus not only worthy but demanding of my time and attention. It’s like watching Michael Jackson’s feet do the moon walk, listening to Enya’s “The Memory of Trees”, smelling fresh rain all while eating a cookie monster and drinking raspberry sorbet dissolving in tonic water, plus 1.

    I love it.

    You should try it.

    It’s wonderful.

  • Slow Degradation in a Metaphorical Fire

    Analogies are powerful tools. We use them a lot, really we do. We use them anytime we are trying to describe a complex topic when all other metaphors fail. Analogies are in fact a form of metaphor that we use to describe something in parallel to something else. When we use a metaphor we use other items to describe the subject at hand; with an analogy we compare the subject at hand to another topic and thus infer using “if, then” statements how one works based on the other.

    Analogies simply enough; you pick a complex topic, say ‘life’, then you pick a less complex thing to compare it to, ‘skydiving’: life is like skydiving. This statement is of course true, to a point. When you go skydiving you instructions from an expert while you’re on the ground, then you load up in a plane, take off and jump. When you jump you get to prove how well you listened to the instructions. Once you’ve landed safely a little car comes and picks you up and takes you back to base. You get a little piece of paper congratulating you on a successful dive (and if you paid enough money you get pictures and a video too). Now you are a skydiving expert. So it is in life that you start out for about 18 years getting instructions from an ‘expert, before you load up into a plane called “school”, take off and then jump into your own life. When you jump you get to prove how well you listened to the instructions. Once you’ve landed safely you get in your little car and drive back to your home. You get a little piece of paper saying “you’re married” (and if you paid enough money you get pictures and a video too). Now you are an expert on life and can raise a family.

    Only it’s not really like that at all. Life isn’t so clearly divided into instruction and action. While skydiving even once gives you some experience, having been a child does little to teach effective parenting skills. Particularly considering how little of our earliest years we remember. Skydiving allows for little feedback in new experiences: that is you can’t keep making small tweaks the entire dive. On the other hand, life allows, and in many ways demands, that you make constant modifications in order to land safely.

    The metaphor works on the beginning levels – when talking about the stages of skydiving compared to the stage of life – but breaks down as it gets more analogous – when we continue the metaphor into having been a child allows one to be a good parent.

    Degradation should be expected as the analogy gets deeper. If there was something that was a perfect analogy of something else you would find that they are in fact the same thing, at least morally and philosophically. They have to be.

    But the point of an analogy is to help others understand something by relating it to something they already know or can at least imagine. In the skydiving example, most people can at least picture described process of preparing and jumping in a way they might not be able to imagine preparing and jumping into life. This parallelism is what makes analogies so rich and important in our daily communications: they are designed to expand understanding in a new field.

    It is important when participating in metaphors and analogies, or expanding our knowledge in any other way, to be able to separate the tools of expansion, that is the metaphor and the analogy, from the actual expansion itself: a deeper understanding of preparing for, and jumping into, life. Coupled with this ability to separate is the ability to identify when a given metaphor has grown into an analogy through complexity and later what the analogy has outgrown our knowledge, breaking down and falling apart, and thus is no longer able to sustain our newly gained understanding. This process is similar to the expansion of truth, rather our perception of truth, through time as we grow our understanding and expand our knowledge.

    As metaphors and analogies break down it may be necessary to develop a new analogy, but caution should be exercised before doing so. Remembering that the entire purpose of the metaphor or analogy was to help us understand something we couldn’t otherwise grasp we should ask: “has understanding expanded enough to allow us to learn the actual thing instead of something that is like the thing?” We should always strive to get along without any metaphor or analogy as they can hinder a more real understanding. Plus, not using the crutch of an analogy removes the problem of degradation altogether.

  • The Drive Home

    The lush green hills unroll before you with the low fog dancing around the hill tops and the occasional beam of golden light streaming through to caress the dew covered grass, bidding it good morning before whisking the dew away in little wafts of steam.

    Ah, this is life, this is home. Even if a morning like this comes but once a year; this single vista makes all the other moments worthwhile. To hear the birds frolic; to smell the moist air; to feel the gentle morning breeze; to taste the fragrant outdoors; to watch over my little world. This is what life is all about.

  • The End of Justice

    The time has come for Justice to be decommissioned. After nearly two years of faithful service, he has been reclaimed by his maker. Okay, not really, but I liked the dramatic flair. The Owner’s laptop is dying and he wants a laptop like Justice and I have been wanting a smaller laptop and so we are trading. To accomplish this I will be shortly wiping Justice and ‘reeducating’ in the work ways so that all he knows is the drone stuff and he will become “LT05”. Sigh, it is sad that even now I am writing his last post ever. We’ve had a fun and good run together but we both knew it wouldn’t last forever.